May 6
A Toast to my Sister
What to say to the person you likely have said too much to…
My sister is a special and awesome person. She is much more like me than my older brother, who somehow escaped a lot of the day to day darkness. I often painstakingly wonder, perhaps when most frustrated with life that I’m thrashing around in the dark for answers, if it could be a result of my mothers increased drinking. Affecting the younger two. I doubt it, but it’s something I sadly think about too often.
She is getting married in less than two weeks. I am a groomsmen to her nice fiancée. He is refreshing in the fact that he’s not carbon copy New England prep that we’re all so familiar with. I mean look at our government / recent supreme court justices with their Georgetown Prep/Harvard roots and their BEACH WEEK! past itineraries. He is not the lacrosse type, he is not the three layers j. crew type with sweater and Patagonia vest fleece type. He doesn’t go to galas or on the board of some buddies charity so that they can put together a big fundraising event in Nantucket. He’s an unorthodox guy from New Hampshire that is extremely down to earth. He is good for my sister in not being emotionally volatile (when I say my sister I just assume what my characteristic/traits are) and he grounds her. With her personality and outgoing, welcoming nature versus his down-the-middle reserved affect, they will be a good fit.
I plan on saying a toast at the rehearsal dinner (thank god I’m not the best man or anything like that) on behalf of my family and I am here today to do some brainstorming. If anyone is reading (doubtful), I welcome any tidbits that you feel have gone over well in toasts or what you feel may be a nice touch. I aim to be brief and simple, manifesting in a toast elements opposite my life. I hope to say a few funny tidbits and be warm. Of course touch upon my sister’s lovely and often zany fun energy and that I am a fan of him. I will leave out the times my sister has had to answer the phone to me crying or in a manic state. I feel for her because it’s not as if we talked everyday and yet when chaos hit my life, I leaned on her. To this day I am not entirely sure why I picked her to unload on. I think her emotional intelligence and the fact she already knows I’m flawed and has accepted that. The fact I think she’s more like me than my brother, who I also love very much. I feel bad that during two particularly intense depressive period she would get text after text after call. What is a younger sibling to do with that? I have never figured out how to thank her for these times, other than the thanks coming in a form of trying not to repeat them.
Okay, enough about me and my wallowing, let’s go to the brainstorming bulletpoints about things I admire about her or a few funny memories. Here’s hoping I can be polished without a few drinks in me.
- She was in a sorority that would literally paint everything in loving exciting neon colors. A little much in the cheerleaders putting paint on the star players cars and their numbers on lockers, etc, but also in a sweet way to make mementos for each other. I found these colors actually described her pretty well. Coolers, signs, walls, dressers. High octane energy that wants to scream at you and cheer for what it believes in. Pep Rally colors.
- She loves animals and fostered a dog and had a killer beanie baby collection when she was younger. She would celebrate their birthdays. Her commitment and attachment was both cute and impressive.
- I think she has perfected being a fake extrovert incredibly better than I have. Anyone that meets her would swear she’s in sales or marketing or perhaps in some high-end event planning. She was born to give tours at her commercial real estate job. It’s a welcoming energy meets polite and fun. The girl you want to get a drink with.
- She’s a wannabe southern belle. Yes, she has the cred that she learned to speak in Texas (I think she did at least) and went to a Southern college. She drops y’all like it’s going out of style and is most comfortable with a beer and chicken fingers at a bar watching an SEC game. “Clemson sucks!”
- She’s successful. She met her fiancée in the same commercial real estate field. He was some top 30 under 30 type in their metropolitan area and she must have seen as much ambition and results as she did chemistry. Not in a gold-digging way, in a respectful admiration way.
- She makes friends naturally and has a ton of them. They are all hot. It’s like she’s living high school late in life.
- He’s all business. She is not. They are like a mullet. Business in front, party in the back. He’ll keep her grounded, she’ll keep him off conference calls (of which he’s been on plenty in the family’s presence).
- She loves Britney Spears. Still. I hope her and her fiancée live a different kind of happy ever after. No conservatorship. “She likes Britney so much, that our Dad thought she might like a conservatorship too — including her fiancee’s top 30 under 30 fat wallet”
- I had a picture of her in my room in which she is in our pool, riding an inflatable dolphin with a pink bucket on her head. Enough said.
I just want her to be happy. She’s getting married relatively late in life and I hope they are blessed with kids and not many interruptions. Certainly her older brother has more professional help now. To toasting water everyone!
